Sleep Escaped Me..

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Elusive, that’s what it is. I rubbed the Mister, kissed him goodnight and then drifted off to sleep. But the mind was only completely blank for what felt like seconds when I was roughly roused by my own fart. It was the loud and deadly kind too. Succeeded in waking the Mister up and eliciting a grunt from him. I bet he hated me.  

So I snuggled up and went right back to sleep - only to be assaulted with the Mister’s full-on dead-tired-kind extra loud snore.

Ah, but it gets better. You see I went right back to sleep, and then my bad ass did the unspeakable. It gave me a bad fart that pulled me right out of dreamland again!

What’s odd about it was I did relieve myself before bed, so I can’t possibly have stuff in there rotting away. (or so I think..)

So now I’m here, telling people like you about how I can’t sleep and why I have a bad ass.

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