Brutally Honest

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Honesty is the best policy. Really. It sets people free.

When you’re honest, no matter how brutally so, there is no need to be tiptoeing around so many things. When you stop being true, you start weaving lies. It starts out with a white lie. And then another one to cover it up. Until all the lies go so far back you live in an alternate universe where you think you can get what you want. But you’ll never get to wherever you’d like to be or whatever you’d like to be. Lies don’t make good foundations.

I’ve found that no matter how painful a truth is, once recognized and accepted, it can be the pillar of a relationship that will shame the most horrible things life can throw at you.

It starts with being true to yourself. When you are true to yourself you become comfortable in your own skin. It makes you glow with the realization that you will never be perfect but you will always be happy with who you are - good and bad. It helps you achieve a balance. While you will continuously make mistakes as you live your life, you will be able to recognize them as such and accept them as lessons. While these lessons can be heartbreaking, they will not stop you from living and loving and laughing.

People can say anything and what people say can mean anything but it’s their actions that will prove the meaning of all that they have to say. Sometimes you come across people who feel badly about things being done to them and they will not say a word. You see the hurt in their eyes but you’ll never hear it from their lips. I think it’s because they can see the bigger picture and are willing to self-sacrifice in the hopes of keeping peace. I just hate leaving things unsaid, especially when people say or do mean things that hurt.

My sister is the epitome of the envious and endlessly jealous. She admitted this in 2006 but I am not sure she accepted it as the root of all lies. Very few suffer the pitfalls of the green eyed monster and get out without hurting fly. My sister broke my heart and furthered the destruction of our family. I’d like to believe that the anger has long gone, but when it hurts I feel like punching her lights out and making her suffer. There is another one out there who suffers from green eyes and like my sister, has succeeded in tearing up a huge path of destruction and has conveniently blamed it all on me. But I am made of stronger stuff. What does not kill me will make me even stronger.

Right now, I wish I didn’t care. I wish I never cared.

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Filed under Family, Family Ties, growing up

Tags: broken hearts, envy, family crap, jealousy, selfish bastards