She’s the mother I imagined I was meant to have. Not that I didn’t have one. It’s just that the one I had always seemed to make me feel like I couldn’t measure up.
I strive to let go of excess baggage because of her. The rage in me was usually quiet whenever I was with her. I could be myself, but she makes me want to be the better version of myself too. She has repeatedly shown me what it meant to forgive and accept people for all the good and bad they can be.
Sometimes I think she knows that my heart is not well but she never says anything. Sometimes I think she wants more time with me, but she never asks for anything. She’s always just there waiting for me to open up, ready to listen.
I think it’s the listening and the not pushing me to do things that makes me feel comfortable. It makes me feel like she understands that I have my ways and I cannot be prodded to do things. She knows that I will eventually make the right choice – it’s just a matter of time.
I want to be like her that way.
And no, she’s not perfect. She’s had her moments. But that I can be myself with her is one of the greatest experiences of my life.
Wednesday, April 1, 2009...12:05 pm
I can be myself with her
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Thursday, April 2, 2009 at 4:09 am
She sounds like a great Mum, in fact I’d say that’s what being a Mum is, if you get it right. I’ll lay bets she makes it look easier than it is though!
Cheers
BC
Sunday, April 12, 2009 at 4:57 pm
I spent yesterday with my 3 year old nephew, and all that running around was making my heart jump into my throat..it was a struggle to not fuss and just let him run and jump..I was just so scared he’ll fall over and hurt himself.
I don’t know how a mother can just let go of a child so that they can learn how to walk and run around and play….it’s scary to think that they will eventually stumble, fall or bump their heads somewhere..